Tinfoil

Tinfoil is the material substance of pure solid conspiracy. It is impervious to electromagnetic radiation from government scanners, all weather formations and most human fashion trends. This material is commonly used to clothe conspiracists, forming jacket linings, underwear and the iconic tinfoil hat. The use of tinfoil clothing also possesses stealth applications for conspirators despite its misuse by government agents and criminals. The powers of tinfoil clothing are believed to derive from its place of origin in the traditional conspiracy hideout, the basement. However, continual storage or usage away from its intended location degrades the material properties of tinfoil.

The German scientist Hans Gutentag discovered tinfoil at 1978 in his secret Berlin laboratory, in his basement in an actual laboratory which was in the basement of the building, by discovering that crinkled metal foil deflects radiation much better than its straight counterpart. This discovery was leaked by fellow researchers on MySpace where all the nerds needed a reason to live. The further study of tinfoil occurred in secret after a government had "dealt" with the German research team. This led to the development of the tinfoil hat and the accidental publication of the blueprint online where it captivated nerds across the world. The design is now in the public domain.